


"Things You Said": Blunder Edition

by remuszaneredvines



Category: Arrested Development
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Fluff, Insomnia, M/M, and everything in between, love these bi magicians
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-25 00:55:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10753350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remuszaneredvines/pseuds/remuszaneredvines
Summary: In honor of May 4th coming up, I wrote a couple of short fics about our two favorite magicians in love. I'll post one every day leading up to Cinco de Cuatro! All are inspired by the "things you said" tumblr prompts.Day 1: Things you said when you thought I was asleep (#12)Day 2: Things you never said at all (#5)Day 3: Things you said that made me feel like shit (#10)Day 4: Things you said under the stars and in the grass (#6)Day 5: Things you said through your teeth (#2)Day 6: Things you said when I was crying (#9)Day 7: Things you said that I wasn't meant to hear (#20)





	1. "things you said when you thought I was asleep"

Tony always woke up in the middle of the night, not because he had to pee or felt thirsty or anything - it was just something that always happened to him. Tonight was the same as most nights, and he was trying to stop himself from turning over and looking at the alarm clock beside the bed because he knew he’d just start thinking about how much time there was before he had to get up, and how if he fell asleep during the next three minutes he might be able to get in at least another 90-minute sleep cycle that doctors and people online always say is important to get - and oh. He'd started overthinking before he even looked at the alarm clock. Nice.

Oh well, he thought, might as well go ahead and look. But when he tried to roll over, he couldn’t, because there was something long and kind of heavy draped across his stomach. He only freaked out for a second before realizing it was GOB's arm wrapped around him. Tony closed his eyes and tried to focus on the weird little hug GOB was giving him in his sleep and the weight of his arm, instead of the time. It actually started to work, and he was half-asleep when he felt the arm tighten a little. "Tony?"

Tony considered opening his eyes and responding, but he was so relaxed and cozy, and GOB only sounded sleepy, not scared or sad, so he'd probably go back to sleep in a second. Plus, situations like these always seemed to lead to sleepy middle-of-the-night sex, and Tony really needed to sleep. And anyway, he knows GOB likes sleepy morning sex better than sleepy middle-of-the-night sex.

But GOB didn’t go back to sleep. "Hey, Tony. I'm kind of glad you're asleep right now, because I don't really know how to say this, or even what I'm trying to say. I just - this is all new to me, the whole boyfriend thing." GOB's voice was somewhere between a murmur and a whisper as he spilled his feelings to Tony. "It's weird, kind of, because I've never really cared about making anyone else happy before. Maybe proud or jealous or something, but never happy. But now I'm always trying to find ways to make you happy. And I feel like it should annoy me, but it doesn't. It just makes me happy too." There was a pause, and Tony tried to keep his breathing regular. He wasn’t sure that GOB would be spilling all this if he were awake, and even though what he was saying seemed kind of private, Tony appreciated this rare, honest insight into his boyfriend’s mind. "I think this is the first time I've really been happy." GOB yawned, and Tony took the chance to swallow down the sudden lump in his throat. "I feel like there's a better way to say all this, but I'll figure it out later. I'm glad you're asleep. It would have been _pret_ -ty embarrassing if you'd heard all that."

GOB paused again for another yawn, and Tony stayed still, not wanting to give away that he had heard his boyfriend’s confession. Tony knew that GOB would have to come to terms with the newness of all of this on his own, and he knew that GOB would find his own way to officially tell Tony how he felt. Probably involving doves. Tony couldn’t help the tiny smile that made its way to his lips at the thought, but luckily GOB didn’t notice anything. GOB wrapped his arm back around Tony securely, sticking his face right into the crook of his boyfriend’s neck. Tony could feel his boyfriend’s lips move against his skin, but he couldn’t make out what he said. That's okay. GOB would tell him when he was ready.

Sleep finally slipped into the corners of his mind, and the only thought in Tony's head was that he didn’t mind waiting, not for GOB.


	2. "things you never said at all"

It was a lazy afternoon, and Tony and GOB were flipping through old photo albums, tossing Cheetos at each other and sipping red wine as they flicked through the glossy pages on Tony’s couch. They’d made a bet on which one of them was the cuter baby, so they’d fished around under Tony’s bed for an album and searched a weird secret room in GOB’s model home for photos. GOB had begged to go first, so of course there was a Bluth family photo album propped open on Tony's lap. There were a ton of GOB’s little brother Buster, and stuck in there loosely were some really rough photos of his sister Lindsay and her daughter mid-birth (ever since, Tony had started cringing whenever one of Lindsay Bluth's political ads came on TV), but there were a few great ones of GOB in there, too. There was a photo of one of his first magic shows - a three or four-year-old Buster was off to the side in the 'audience', along with a few stuffed animals, but the star of the photo was definitely GOB. The picture was a little blurry (GOB told him that Michael, who would've been seven or so, took it), but Tony could make out GOB's blanket cape and ink pen magic wand. There was another photo of an even younger GOB staring down at a newborn baby that had been placed in his arms. The baby was the focal point of the photo - the top of toddler GOB's head didn’t even make the frame - but GOB still smiled when he saw it, and he told Tony that it was him and Michael the day his brother was born. 

They finally finished up GOB's albums - the last half had been full of photos of Buster, which GOB had flicked through impatiently with Cheeto fingers to find any that featured himself. There weren't many, but GOB had jabbed excitedly at each one. When they reached the end, they cracked open Tony's album, and he immediately became embarrassed that there were so many photos of himself, compared to the scattering of pictures of GOB in his own albums. But GOB pointed just as happily at all of the photos of Tony (taking care not to leave Cheeto fingerprints, at Tony’s behest), and squeezed his hand when they came across photos of his late brother, and snorted at the bar mitzvah photos where thirteen-year-old Tony was drowning in a suit that was clearly way too big for him. He especially loved the succession of yearly family photos, where Tony’s hairstyle changed drastically with each one. 

Eventually, the two reached the end of the albums, and Tony put them on the coffee table while GOB found something on Netflix. Tony topped off their wine glasses, and they both snuggled up close together under a blanket to watch the movie - a documentary about bees, apparently. Tony hadn’t taken GOB for the documentary type - he hadn’t thought GOB had the attention span for it - but he’d been mistaken. If GOB was interested in something, he could read or watch stuff about it for hours on end. Sure, his interests were kind of narrow - he knew a whole lot about bees, monster movies, and, funny enough, the past acts of Tony himself - but when it came to things he actually cared about, GOB lacked no focus. 

In fact, it was Tony who found himself with attention problems. He tried to focus on the video, but his eyes kept drifting back to the photo albums on the coffee table. Specifically, the Bluth family photo album. Tony would never point out that the only photos of GOB and his parents together was taken about ten minutes after he was born, and that even then, neither of them looked very pleased. And he would never say out loud that everything he’d heard about GOB’s childhood seemed to point to the fact that GOB was clearly the least favorite of his siblings. 

So yeah, maybe Tony insisted on taking, like, twenty selfies of himself and GOB that night. And yeah, maybe he was planning on picking up a ton of scrapbooking supplies so he could print off those selfies and make something awesome out of them for GOB’s birthday. It’s no big deal.


	3. "things you said that made me feel like shit"

“And then I can make sure to get a shot of you from the back, that way people can see - oh, wait, that won't work either…” GOB muttered, half to Tony and half to himself as he tried to figure out how to turn on his new camcorder. Tony had changed up his act some, and was taping his performance that night so he could put some clips on his website. He’d even hired a video crew, even though GOB had told him that was stupid, because he could make a video himself that would be much better than one by some “professional” crew that didn't even know Tony. GOB had brought along his own camera to prove it, even though Tony was shooting his “professional” video that evening. If only he could turn the damn thing on...

“Power button’s right there, Gobie.” Tony pointed to a button on top of the device which, now that GOB looked closer, did have that universal symbol for a power button on it. 

GOB pressed the button and the screen lit up. “Hey, it worked! You're a genius, Tony.”

“I know,” Tony replied absently. The two of them were on the stage of the club where Tony would be performing a show that night. Tony was checking each trick panel, mirror, and glitter cannon on stage, as usual. “Hey, don't get any of this on camera, babe,” he instructed GOB. “Don’t want anyone finding out the secrets.”

“Oh, right.” GOB pressed the power button again. He watched Tony check a trapdoor on the stage and, noting how anxious he looked, headed over to help him out. Sometimes, Tony got a little too nervous about his illusions and needed someone to bring him back down to earth. GOB took a few deep breaths with his boyfriend, and reassured him that all his preparation was going to pay off and that everything would go fine, the normal stuff he knew Tony needed to hear, and punctuated his pep talk with a quick kiss. 

Tony sighed, and squeezed GOB’s hand. “Thanks, Gobie. That…means a lot. I'm sorry I get so worked up about this kind of thing, I can't help it.”

GOB grinned, happy to help. “Anyti-”

“Hey, the video crew is here,” interrupted the bar’s stage manager. “Are you ready for them?”

GOB watched as the tension visibly pinched Tony’s face. “Yeah, let them in.”

The crew rushed over to Tony, and GOB had to step back to avoid being crushed. He watched them greet Tony and quickly get down to business - there were only about two hours until the show started, and the crew needed to know where to set up their cameras and stuff. Tony walked them around the stage and gave them a rundown of the show - telling none of the secrets, of course, but giving them enough information so they could figure out what to film. GOB followed them around the stage, filming some stuff on his own camcorder, and giving the “professional crew” some tips every now and again. The camera guys looked a little annoyed with him, but hey, who would know how to film Tony’s show better than his own boyfriend?

“Oh, you should definitely film that one - the explosion at the end gets me every time!”

“Hey, can you move for a second? I wanna get a shot of these cannons...”

“You should really film from the other side of the stage - that way you get his good side. His right side’s his good side - easy to remember, right? Right and good -”

“GOB, will you please just let the guys do their jobs?” Tony interrupted exasperatedly. 

GOB stepped back, eyes wide. “I was just - I'm sorry.” He blinked hard, and said, “I'll just get out of the way then,” but Tony had been whisked too far away by the crew to hear him. He backed away to the wings of the stage and watched as Tony gestured expansively around the area to the people with cameras. GOB turned his own camcorder off and found a bench backstage, trying to ignore the tightness in his throat. Then he realized that Tony would be backstage as part of an illusion at several points during his acts, so he found a door that led to an alcove outside the club instead. He didn't want to throw Tony off - God knew he got anxious enough at shows.

He leaned against the wall outside the club and watched a streetlamp flick on. That was the thing, though, wasn't it? How anxious Tony got before shows? GOB should be backstage, calming him down and telling him everything would be fine, not standing outside and trying to swallow down a suspiciously large lump in his throat. 

It was just that he'd thought he finally had something he could show Tony to make him proud, something that made GOB important to Tony. As much as he enjoyed spending time with his boyfriend, it was unsettling to not know why Tony kept him around. If someone kept GOB around, there was always something specific they expected of him, whether it was intimidating board members or sex or driving a limo around or whatever else. If he wasn’t useful to Tony, then why was he even there?

Jesus. He'd really fucked this one up. 

“Hey, you can’t stand around out here!” the stage manager shouted from the doorway he’d just exited from.

Shit. He couldn’t go backstage again - it might throw Tony off even more if he felt like he had to talk to GOB. Maybe he could get a seat in the audience? That way, Tony would at least know he was there and hadn't left the bar. 

The sky was getting pretty dark. GOB checked his watch - the doors opened in about fifteen minutes, and the show would start in about forty-five. He'd just head around to the front of the club and hang out there until the doors opened, and get a seat like a normal person. 

He chewed on his nails while he waited. After the left thumbnail and middle finger nail were gone, the club’s bouncer came out. A couple of people lined up behind GOB - one of them was wearing a pink “W” pin on his shirt, and GOB smiled a little at that. He pulled his camcorder back out and got a couple of shots of the fans - even if Tony got a professional video done that night, he might still like to see the fans waiting outside, GOB reasoned. 

Once they let everyone in, GOB got a seat near the front on the left side, and went ahead and got comfortable - well, as much as he could be, when he knew Tony was up there about to come on stage. It was weird, sitting in the audience. GOB was used to seeing the show unfold from behind the scenes, just because he was usually backstage to help Tony double- and triple-check the traps and equipment. He felt almost like he was in the Gothic Castle back in April, when he and Tony had drinks together and he bit his tongue, and then they went and stole those pies…

GOB was startled out of his reminiscing by a hand on his shoulder. It was the stage manager from earlier, looking even more stressed than she had been earlier. “You’re GOB, right?”

His immediate instinct was to say no, but GOB fought it back and nodded.

“Tony Wonder has been looking for you - he says he won’t start the show until you get backstage. And if we don’t start on time, there’s gonna be a lot of angry patrons. So get backstage.”

“Oh - uh - ” GOB stuttered, but the look the stage manager gave him was enough to propel him out of his seat. He followed her out a side door, and found himself in the same outside alcove he’d been in before. The manager led him back through the stage door he’d exited earlier, and GOB found himself backstage once again. He could see Tony about ten feet away, checking the latches on a trapdoor and yelling something at one of the cop actors - in other words, he was really anxious. GOB walked halfway over to his boyfriend, and then called, “Tony?” 

Tony looked up, and GOB could see some of the tension leave his face. “GOB?” He stood up and made his way over to GOB, careful not to step on any secret platforms or trip over any cables. 

“Hey, Tony, what’s up?” GOB asked, once Tony was standing in front of him.

“Hey, Gobie. I -” Tony sighed. “I’m really sorry for snapping at you earlier. It was...pretty mean of me, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it, so I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”

GOB’s feelings were still kind of hurt, but he shrugged and said, “It’s okay. I know you wanted to get a good, professional video, so. It’s okay. Where’s the crew, though? Shouldn’t they be set up by now?”

“I...told the crew to go home. They were getting in the way, you know, and I felt like they were getting a little too nosey about the secrets.” Tony looked back towards the cannons and trapdoors, then back at GOB, who just said,

“Oh.”

“Yeah. So, if you’re not too mad at me, do you maybe want to do some filming? You’d have to be offstage, just because I don’t want you to get hit by a glitter cannon or anything, but…”

GOB broke into a grin. “Sure! Oh, man, I have so many good ideas for the video! I was thinking that for the rainbow fish illusion, I could -”

“Why don’t you surprise me?” Tony said, smiling for the first time since he’d stepped on the stage that night. 

GOB just kept grinning, and nearly squeezed Tony into a hug before remembering the many spring-loaded tricks up both of their sleeves and jacket pockets. He settled for taking Tony’s hands and pulling him in for a kiss. 

“Hey! Are you about ready, Mr. Wonder? It’s time to -”

“Give me five minutes,” Tony called to the stage manager, who looked like she was about to tear her hair out. 

GOB leaned close to Tony. “Geez, what crawled up her ass and died?” Tony laughed, but then bit his lip and said,

“Gobie, would you help me check the cannons again?”

And GOB knew Tony didn’t like having to check the trapdoors and cables and cannons over and over again, but he also knew that if they didn’t, Tony would be nervous throughout the entire show and maybe throw up from tension afterwards, so they went back through the cannons once and the trapdoors twice. Then they kissed one more time, and Tony took his place in the closet prop as GOB quietly slipped out from behind the curtain and took his own spot in front of stage right (so he could get Tony’s good side).

GOB crouched down and turned on his camcorder. Shortly afterward, the show started, and the first illusion ended with Tony bursting out of the closet. He took center stage, and winked right at GOB as the audience clapped. GOB smiled right back at him, and settled in to film the best magic video ever made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a great fic on AO3 by yurusu that had the idea of Tony being very anxious before shows, and it’s since been deleted :( shoutout to that fic though, for sticking in my head all this time!


	4. "things you said under the stars and in the grass"

It was a warm night in late May, and Tony and GOB were lying on the fairway of a golf course, exhausted from a night out on the town, but not ready to go back to their respective homes. For the past hour, the two had been passing a giant bag of M&Ms back and forth, sometimes talking about whatever came to mind, and sometimes just enjoying the quiet. They’d been silent for a while when GOB spoke up. 

“I hope I don't forget this.”

Tony was silent for another moment, trying to figure out what GOB meant. He couldn’t. “What do you mean?” He lolled his head over to look at the other magician. GOB was staring straight up at the smattering of stars above them, only a few visible through the haze of the city a few miles away. 

“It's just that sometimes I forget things. And sometimes it's not even because of the Forget-Me-Nows.” GOB was still staring up at the sky. “I think it's because of the syphilis. They told me that might happen in the hospital.”

Tony didn’t really know what to say to that. 

“It doesn't happen a lot, but I never know when it will happen. That’s kind of scary.”

They both just breathed. In the distance, cars whizzed by, but all was still on the golf course. 

GOB laughed, and his voice pitched upwards. “You-you know, they told me I might have died if somebody hadn’t called 911 and got me to a hospital. Like, not right away, but maybe later, from a heart attack or getting hurt during a seizure or something.”

Tony was quiet, but his brain was loud. GOB, dying? 

“It’s okay now, though. Sometimes I forget stuff and sometimes I can’t really get words out, but that’s basically the same as before, so it’s okay.”

Tony couldn’t really see GOB’s face, but he was pretty sure that if he could, he’d see that desperate, panicky look GOB got when he wanted to pretend everything was okay and it really wasn’t. 

“...I hope you don’t forget this either, GOB.” Tony reached over and took GOB’s hand - he could do that now, since they were officially boyfriends(!). He reached his other hand into the M&M bag. “Hey, there’s still a few left in here. You want to see how many I can get into your mouth?” Tony asked, sitting up and hiding a wince as his back cracked. 

For a second, GOB didn't look like he'd heard Tony. But then he squeezed Tony’s hand and hoisted himself up, and opened his mouth obediently. Tony sucked at tossing, but that was okay, because it got GOB smiling and laughing again. He didn’t really know what to say about the whole syphilis-induced dementia-like symptoms, so he didn’t say anything at all. Instead, he just finished tossing the candy at his boyfriend, and tackled him to the grass so he could kiss GOB’s sticky-sweet mouth - not to make GOB forget what they’d been talking about, but to make the night so memorable that he couldn’t possibly forget it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For such a complex show, Arrested Development throws GOB’s syphilis in as a joke and never really goes back into it. To have Stage 4 syphilis (more commonly referred to as neurosyphilis), GOB would have to have been infected several years prior to his collapse in Colony Collapse in early 2012. Unless he was also infected with HIV, which would have intensified and sped up the effects of the syphilis. (I did too much research on syphilis for this short little fic.) Given the timeline of the show and the symptoms GOB shows in that snippet of Colony Collapse, he could be suffering from the general paresis form of neurosyphilis/stage 4 syphilis, which can start to set in as early as three years after the original infection, but usually sets in a little later. It is known to cause emotional disturbances and mood swings (hello, darkness, my old friend…) in its victims and can progress to dementia if not treated in a timely manner. Poor GOB. 
> 
> Did I do way too much research for this and possibly read too far into a simple throwaway joke and timeline discrepancy? Maybe. But if I’m going to do it for any show, I might as well do it for Arrested “Arm Off” Development.


	5. "things you said through your teeth"

Tony faced GOB, his feet carefully dodging the plumes of flame that erupted from the stage floor. GOB was making wild, showy hand gestures pointed towards Tony’s feet, perfectly timed so it looked like he was causing the flames, and then their roles switched, with Tony ‘shooting’ smoke towards GOB and the latter dodging. 

The voiceover rang out, “We always tried to one-up each other, his illusions extravagant, mine subtle and mysterious.”

The story wasn't entirely true (baking yourself into a loaf of bread wasn't exactly mysterious, and GOB and Tony's rivalry was never really two-sided), but Tony and GOB had found it difficult to fit both of their actually true revenge plots (both of which had been quite convoluted and not easily explained to an audience) into a roughly 45-minute magic show. They were playing around with different plot lines, and it seemed that people really liked the shows where they were rivals who fell in love.

There was a puff of smoke and a loud bang, and both Tony and GOB disappeared from the crowd’s sight. Two cables were dropped down from the rafters above, and Tony quickly attached them to the harness under his suit jacket. Then he was swiftly hoisted up to a platform on the left of the stage, about ten feet in the air. From there, he watched GOB, under cover of smoke, drop through a trapdoor on the opposite side of the stage so he could get in position for his last appearance.

The smoke cleared to reveal Tony alone up on the platform, ready for his next lines to play over the tape. “My success let me rise to the top, but I realized that I was lonely up there.” 

“And then I realized that the one I needed...had been there the whole time.” 

The lights went down on Tony, and he was quickly wired over to another darkened platform, this one wider and in the middle of the stage. He took his spot on the left side of the platform and removed his cables as he waited for the wires to pull GOB up as well.

“And now, we’re here..”

GOB flew up on his cables and landed on the platform with a wince. Tony quickly steadied him and unhooked his cables.

“We’re queer…”

GOB was still grimacing, leaning on Tony and taking the weight off one of his legs. “You okay?” Tony asked quickly. GOB nodded, then let go of Tony’s shoulder and stood up as straight as he could. 

“And now, we're up here!”

The light flicked on and shone on the darkened platform. Tony and GOB grasped hands just like they'd practiced, and held them up like they were victors. 

“What happened? Are you alright?” Tony asked, his words masked by the cheering and disguised by his bright stage-grin.

“I think I broke my fucking ankle,” GOB said through his giant smile.

Tony’s eyes widened, his grin freezing on his face. “What?”

“Yeah. I think I fell through the trapdoor wrong. It hurts really fucking bad, Jesus Christ.” Up close, Tony could see that GOB’s stage grin was actually a grimace of pain, but from the looks of the wildly applauding audience, they couldn’t tell a thing. Thank God they’d moved the “We’re here, we’re queer” part to the end of the show, so he and GOB would be able to get down in a minute and get his ankle on some ice. 

Tony did some quick thinking and slipped his right arm around GOB’s waist to support him, and threw up his left arm as the crowd continued to cheer. GOB caught on after a moment, and wrapped his own arm around Tony’s waist, then took as much weight as he could off his left leg. They continued smiling - or at least, faking their smiles - as the applause continued. The glitter cannons went off once, twice, three times, and then the smoke machines started at full blast. After what seemed like forever, the stage became obscured by smoke, and the curtains finally closed. 

Instantaneously, Tony’s stage grin dropped, and he shouted down at the stage crew, “Hey! GOB hurt his ankle, be extra careful when you bring him down!” 

They carefully got GOB off the platform with the cables and harness, and by the time Tony was cabled down, his boyfriend was sitting on the floor with a plastic bag of ice resting on his ankle. Once his feet hit the ground, Tony immediately turned to the stagehands and stage manager, who were standing by 

“You guys should have been more careful setting up the trapdoor! What if -”

“Tony, it’s fine! I just didn’t have my feet planted right when the trapdoor opened, is all. It happens. It’s not their fault.” Tony looked like he wanted to argue, but instead he asked the stagehand, “Do you have any more ice?” The guy left to get some, and Tony kneeled down beside GOB and asked, “Are you sure none of them did anything to the trapdoor? It could have been sabotage… you don’t think those stagehands were some of Dynamic Darji’s guys, do you?”

GOB shook his head. “I don’t think so. And don’t worry - it’s not because we didn’t check them enough before the show, either. I just landed wrong when the trapdoor opened up. It could happen to anybody.”

Tony cupped the back of GOB’s neck with his hand and stroked the skin there with his thumb. “I guess. I just hate that it happened to you.”

Despite the pain in his ankle, GOB smiled and leaned into Tony’s touch. Soon, the stagehand came back with another bag of ice, and Tony situated it on his boyfriend’s ankle before pulling out his phone. 

“Hang on, Gobie - gonna make a couple of calls.” He kept stroking GOB’s neck - just how he knew he liked it - and unlocked his phone. Tony called the hospital first - they said to come into the emergency room, so GOB could get an X-ray and see if his ankle was actually broken, or just sprained. Then Tony dialed up his agent, trying to get someone to come load up the equipment into his trailer and bring it back to his house. GOB sat on the floor, listening to Tony’s voice and feeling his hand on his neck as he watched the stage guys dismantle the platforms and take down the cables. The pain in his ankle was dying down to a dull throb, and he really didn’t think it was that bad - wait, no, it was pretty bad, he thought when Tony and one of the stage guys tried to help him to his feet. 

The stagehand had to help GOB to the car - Tony was a little indignant, but he _was _on the small side, and GOB was a lanky six-foot-two. Tony drove them to the hospital to get GOB’s ankle checked out. It turned out to be just a bad sprain, and while it looked pretty gross and swollen at the moment, it would be okay in a few weeks.__

__The show had ended at ten, and it was half-past eleven when the two made it back to Tony’s house - GOB hadn’t officially moved in there yet, but the Bluth model house with all its stairs was not a good place for a guy on crutches to be for the next few weeks. Half-past eleven was actually an early night for Tony and GOB, considering that they usually stuck around for a few drinks and photos with fans after their shows, and sometimes there would be a drag show after their own act, and who wouldn’t want to stick around for that?_ _

__But that night, it was just the two of them in Tony’s living room. GOB was propped up on the couch, his foot elevated and iced, like the doctor had told him to do. Tony was hovering around, asking stuff like, “You’re sure everything’s okay?”_ _

__“It’s really fine, Tony. This isn’t the worst injury I’ve gotten from doing an illusion. You remember the first time we met?”_ _

__“The first time… oh, yeah! With the Sword of Destiny and the assistant magician switch-up! And - oh, god, your fingers…”_ _

__“Yeah.” GOB lifted his left hand. “My assistant sliced the first two clean off. And the doctor reattached them wrong the first time, so I had to get the surgery done again.”_ _

__Tony stared at GOB’s hand, at the two little scars that ringed around his fingers, and then back at the ACE bandage around his ankle. “Jesus. So this really isn’t that bad, in the grand scheme of things.”_ _

__“Nah. And hey, you had that nut thing -” Tony winced, “-sorry. I know you don’t like to talk about it.”_ _

__“I’d rather not relive having a bird pecking out my balls, yeah. But anyways, now we have time to chill out for a couple of weeks, starting now!”_ _

__GOB grinned. “We sure do. And chilling out means you sitting down and hanging out with me, not hovering around like that.”_ _

__Tony stood in front of the couch, but didn’t sit down. “You’re sure you don’t need anything?”_ _

__“I need you to get yourself right over here and warm me up. This ice is cold as shit.”_ _

__Tony grinned, and obliged._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my favorite one I've written. :D


	6. "things you said when I was crying"

GOB pushed open the door to the model home, dropped his briefcase, and headed upstairs, not stopping until he reached the edge of his bed. He flopped onto it, facedown, and lay there until discomfort forced him to kick off his fancy $300 business shoes and then his socks, just because he didn't like how socks felt without shoes. His head was aching, and swimming with all sorts of things - how no one could agree on what came after a ‘trillion’, why elevators had to be so small, and all the stuff the angry Bluth Company employees had been saying at the meeting he'd held earlier that day. With every beat of his heart, his head throbbed again, and GOB tried to bury it in pillows, but nothing helped. Between the swimming thoughts, the idea to go get some painkillers or alcohol or something surfaced, but the thought of getting up and going downstairs didn't sound good to his tired brain. 

It would be much easier, his brain said, to reach up onto the headboard and grab a Forget-Me-Now. It would be nice to just go to sleep, and then remain blissfully unaware of all of this when he woke up.

But Tony had all of his Forget-Me-Nows. He’d said that GOB was too dependent on them for happiness and sleep and everyday life, and so GOB had given them to Tony, to get him to stop sounding like Michael. But there were maybe some in his bathroom, or maybe in a pants pocket in the laundry. His head throbbed once especially painfully, and the angry voices of the employees began to mix up with Michael’s disappointed voice and Tony’s worried one. 

Thinking about Tony made GOB feel a little better. If he'd been there during the meeting, he would have totally had GOB’s back against all those investors. He would've held GOB’s hand as they rode the elevator back down to the ground floor, ensuring that if the elevator got stuck he’d have someone with him. And he would’ve taken all kinds of shortcuts so they could have avoided all the afternoon traffic coming out of Newport Beach. 

GOB crawled under the covers, fully clothed except for his shoes. There was still sunlight streaming in through the windows, and GOB buried his head in the pillows to block it out. The storm in his head had quieted down to a moderate buzz, but GOB still felt overwhelmed and exhausted. He really wished Tony were there, he thought miserably. 

_“Why don’t you go away, Getaway, stay -”_

Well, speak of the devil. GOB answered the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey, Gobie, it’s Tony!” At the sound of Tony’s voice, GOB felt a lump come up in his throat. 

His voice wobbled, but he was able to choke out a “Hey Tony, what’s up?”

“Not much here. I was just hanging out, watching TV, and was wondering if you wanted to do something?”

“I - yeah, that sounds -” Out of nowhere, a sob rose from somewhere deep in GOB’s chest, and his eyes filled up with hot tears. GOB tried to take a deep breath and calm himself down, but it seemed that the pent-up anxiety of his day had finally found a way to express itself.

Tony must have heard his voice break, because he quickly asked, “Whoa, GOB, are you okay? What’s the matter?”

GOB wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “Yeah, I’m okay - I don’t even know why I’m crying, really.” He really didn’t - he wasn’t really sad anymore, so was he happy? But happy felt fast, and GOB didn’t really feel fast, he just felt...better. Like a weight had come off his chest and left him feeling light for the first time that day. 

“Are you alright? Did something happen?” Tony asked.

“Just a bad day. And it was really nice to hear your voice after it,” GOB said. ‘Gay,’ his brain said, but GOB had kind of stopped caring. “You, uh, you wanted to go do something?”

“Well, I was going to suggest going out to get some dinner, but I think maybe this calls for something a little more low-key. I’m thinking pizza and a movie, what about you?”

GOB grinned, and wiped his face again. “Same! That sounds really good.”

“Great! I’ll see you in half an hour, okay?”

“Okay.” GOB took a deep, slightly shuddery breath, and grinned. He had a pizza to order, and a date night to get ready for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, when you’ve had a shit day, all it takes is a couple of nice words from somebody you love to make you break down completely.  
> If this seems unbelievable, let it be known that this exact situation happened between me and my best friend during finals week last semester.


	7. "things you said that I wasn't meant to hear"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Cinco de Cuatro!

“This is an illusion that dates back to the ancient Aztecs, concerning the duplication of human beings. Prepare to be amazed as your father steps inside…”

GOB clambered into the Aztec Tomb, and then Tony, who was already hiding inside the tomb, opened the secret panel and got into position.

“...and two fathers emerge!” GOB and Tony burst out of the Aztec Tomb, and showers of confetti and glitter rained from their jacket sleeves. 

Steve Holt’s jaw dropped, and he started clapping. “Wow! That was really cool, Dad! But what does -”

“Tony, meet Steve! And Steve, meet Tony - my boyfriend, and your new dad, kind of!”

Steve broke into a giant grin. “New Dad!” he whooped, shaking his fists over his head in a cheer. “It’s great to meet you, New Dad!”

“Uh, you can really just call me Tony -”

“No way, New Dad!” Steve exclaimed, enveloping Tony in a giant hug. Tony was pretty touched, but also kind of uncomfortable with the sudden touchy-feely embrace. GOB seemed to sense Tony’s discomfort, and said,

“Hey, how about a hug for your original dad?”

Steve squeezed GOB in a hug just as tight, and asked, “So, how’s the magic biz? Do you guys do shows together, or…?”

GOB launched into an explanation of how he’d left the family company to do shows with Tony, how they were “GOB Bluth and Tony Wonder: The Magic of Love”, premiering on Saturday nights at any gay club in Orange County that their agent could get them into. Tony interjected occasionally, but GOB seemed really excited to explain the recent developments in his life to his son, so he let GOB carry the conversation.

At one point, Tony excused himself to get a glass of water. From the kitchen, he was able to hear this exchange:

“So, Dad, how did you and New Dad meet?”

GOB’s voice lowered conspiratorially, and Tony had to strain to hear what he divulged next. “You remember the time I was trying to get you to come to that gay club and act like my boyfriend so I could sabotage somebody’s magic trick?”

“Um, I think so? I’m sorry I didn’t go, but I wasn’t really com-”

“No, it’s okay. I ended up getting my nephew - your cousin, actually, George-Michael - I got him to go with me. I just had to convince everyone I was gay so I could get in, and sabotage Tony’s show. But then we met after the show and had drinks, and we really hit it off and fell in love and now we’re here!” 

“Wow, that’s, uh, quite a story, Dad!” Steve laughed. “But I’m happy for...”

Tony tuned out, stuck on one thing GOB said. GOB had been at the Gothic Castle that night to sabotage his show? Obviously, it hadn’t worked. But still - he’d been there to sabotage him? Well...Tony guessed it was no worse than what he’d done - planned on stringing GOB along and tried to make him fall in love with him, so Tony could out him as a gay Christian. And wasn’t there internet money involved, too? Thinking back, his plan had been pretty convoluted and far-fetched. But...it had turned out pretty well for him, considering. Maybe their plans for sabotage canceled out, or something. At any rate, he couldn’t dwell too much on the matter at the moment. 

Tony took a sip of water and a deep breath, and prepared himself to start building a relationship with this first little piece of GOB’s family.


End file.
